Control is a funny word. It implies that you have power and influence in a given situation. It implies that you are making the choices. It implies that you are responsible for the outcomes. It’s funny because time and time again people act like things are out of their control. But are they?
It’s easier to allow others to take the fall for things that aren’t going your way. It’s easier to let the reason why you don’t go after your goals to be put on someone else’s shoulders. But in truth, the only one who can affect what is happening to you or for you, is you. You are in control of when to let go of something and when to hold on to it. But how do you know what to do?
The “how” is only determined when you have had a conversation with yourself. The question you need to ask yourself is, does this “something” serving me for the greater good. This “greater good” I’m referring to is the big picture of your life. Looking at events, people, opportunities through the lenses of the “big picture” will allow you to see that there are a great many things in your control and it’s up to you to let go or hold on accordingly.
You’re in CONTROL of…
That’s right. You are in control of all of things pertaining only to you. You get to decide your reactions to things. You get to decide what you allow into your space. You get to decide what you accept from other people, be it actions or words. You get to decide what you will and will not do. You always have a choice, always.
You make decisions on how your life will proceed each and every day. Are you spending your days reacting or are you spending your days growing? Reacting means that you are putting out fires that you let spark in the first place. Reacting means that you accepted something short term because you were looking for a quick way out, and now are trying to undo it. Reacting doesn’t allow for growth and living. It allows for being on the defense and existing.
If you spend your days growing, you have that big picture in mind. You can see what you want your life to be like and you say no to everything that isn’t that. When we can’t see the big picture, when we have too many ball sin the air and we are trying to be too many things to too many people, we lose sight of who we are and who we are striving to be. Sure, some decisions we make are made as a means for survival, but the quality of the choices you are making is completely within your control. Your choice is often determined by how you view your own worth. If you view yourself as less worthy or more worthy, your decisions will reflect that.
Learning to let go of things that are not serving you, that are not going to help you get towards your greater good, will take a lot of tenacity, courage, and big picture thinking. You have to be focused on personal growth for those to reside within you. Most of what you need to let go of is harmful to you in some way, shape, or form.
Are there people in your life who are harmful to you? Maybe it’s their actions or maybe it’s their words. If you are letting them affect you, that’s on you. You ae in control of what you let in. You are in control of who you surround yourself with. You are in control of how much power you are giving to these people. So when will you decide that you need to let them go, when you acknowledge that you are worth more than that. You are deserving of a full, rich, successful life, but you have to work for it. You have to decide that a certain person or people aren’t who you need to help you grow and then limit or remove the time that you spend with them. Only you can do that for you.
People that you need to hold on to are people who are lifting you up with their words, their spirit, and their presence. These are people that are inspired by your growth and are willing to grow with you. These are not people who would prefer that you stay where you are and be there equals. These are people who acknowledge the light in you and step aside so that you can shine. These are the people that you should hold on to and hold on tight.
The same is true for groups that your part of, a job/career that you have, a position that you hold. Are these things pushing you towards the big picture that you’re holding for yourself? Are these things helping you reach for your greater good? If they aren’t then exercise your control and let them go, walk away, and don’t look back. You are in control. You. Things only happen to us when we give them power over us.
Your gut, your heart, your spirit…they know when things are right. You can feel that. You may ignore it for a while. You may try to push those feelings down and try to convince yourself that you’re imagining things. This is especially true if you’ve invested a lot of time into a relationship, personal or business. With that being said, acknowledge what you learned from the experience(s) and use that as a building block moving forward.
Your eyes must stay on the big picture and you must push yourself towards your own greater good. No one will do this for you. No one is invested in your life the way that you are. No one will fight for you the way that you will. No one. But you need to be willing to do the work. You need to be willing to exercise your control. Only you can decide when that will be. Why not start now?